Dear Tristan - 3 Years, 8 Months

Dear Tristan,
When we went to the Matthews Sandy Feet Festival you were finally tall enough to ride some of the rides. We put you in the swings that spin in a circle and it was all I could do not to have a panic attack. You're so LITTLE. And so HIGH UP. And so FAR away from Mommy. What if you got scared and uncliped yourself. My legs were tense, coiled. Ready to run and catch if I needed to. I was suddenly thankful that Daddy's been running sprints at the gym. You didn't fall. You didn't unclip yourself. You didn't look nervous. Turns out the only one that was terrified was me. As usual.



You are so tall that on Wednesday when you went on a field trip with Connor's Pre-K class I noticed that you were as tall as about half of the class. Sadly, it means that it won't be long before I can no longer recycle Connor's clothes, passing them down to you. By the time that happens though, I'm sure you'll be just fine with having new clothes of your own. Or maybe you'll go through such a fast and furious spurt that we'll pass your clothes down to him. I'm sure he'll just LOVE that.



It's going to be an amazing Summer for you. You are finally tall enough to ride the rides and old enough to go all day without having to nap. That doesn't mean we can tolerate you in the evenings when you're run ragged and napless, but it's getting easier. We are going to start swimming lessons for you and I'm so excited that finally you will be old enough to take a class on your own instead of watching your brother on the sidelines. You've been watching brother do, whether it be swimming, gymnastics or trial karate classes. I can't wait for you to have a chance to develop your own talents. I can't wait to watch you shine.
I love you,
Ama

SO Happy!

After simply dropping the files that were missing from blogger into the root folder, all of my images are back! *Deep sigh of relief here* No relinking! Now I can get back to designing and tweaking and writing.

Why?

Why?! Why is WP putting my posts in Times New Roman when I can't find any reference at all to TNRoman in the CSS?! WHY?!?! Surely I'll not have to change the html code each time I post. Surely.

Overhaul

We Jorma tried rerouting the cname dohiggies as the blogger tutorial told us to. Did not work. I called the hosting company and they tried something from their end. Did not work. My hope was to temporarily fix the missing images problem. Long enough to move into Wordpress so I could avoid relinking all of the images in the blog. Did not work. It looks like now I'm stuck relinking all of my images manually, but at least I'm not relinking AND copying and pasting all of my files from my HTML back up, recatagorizing and redating everything. That would suck so much worse.
I moved over to WordPress because I'm mad at Blogger. And because I wanted to have more control over my site. The only problem with this is that I was so desperate to get away from blogger and try to reclaim the blog that I jumped into WP without having any idea how it works. Sink or swim, baby.
I have wordpress questions. Most of them I am figuring out as I go along, but I think the answer to a lot of them is going to be something that I'm not going to like. Something like learn CSS and edit the files manually. In all my spare time.
Seriously, this application has spellcheck for 12 different languages but I can't change my font unless I edit the CSS? That can't be right. And what's up with the little Mystery Man icon next to all of my posts? I don't need that because I'm the sole author and I can't find the place that has the little check box to remove it. Shouldn't there be one? Granted I've only been at this for two days and am trying to work on it during preschool hours and while the kids are sleeping. I don't think the learning curve is really that steep, but it's still daunting to say the least.
Hopefully, I'll be gracing you all with my snarky commentary soon.

Still Trying

We are still trying to get the FTP situation fixed. I'm giving it 48 hours for the DNS server to repopulate with the changes that the tech support guy made and if that doesn't work, well, it's going to be overhaul time.
I'm ready either way. There's stuffs that I want to write about and pictures that I need to post and well, because although I don't blog nearly as much as I'd like to, now that the blog isn't working correctly, all I want to do is post something.

Still Trying

We are still trying to get the FTP situation fixed. I'm giving it 48 hours for the DNS server to repopulate with the changes that the tech support guy made and if that doesn't work, well, it's going to be overhaul time.
I'm ready either way. There's stuffs that I want to write about and pictures that I need to post and well, because although I don't blog nearly as much as I'd like to, now that the blog isn't working correctly, all I want to do is post something.

$&!%#$#@Q@$%^!!!!!

Ok, now since we've switched all of the CNET names the rest of my site is down. Hopefully we'll be up and running again soon. Please bear with us during this time of confusion.

$&!%#$#@Q@$%^!!!!!

Ok, now since we've switched all of the CNET names the rest of my site is down. Hopefully we'll be up and running again soon. Please bear with us during this time of confusion.

#$%#&#@!!!!!

You may notice something different about the blog. Something odd. Something like all of the pictures not showing up. This is because Blogger has disabled FTP completely and all of the users like myself that have been using FTP to upload their blog posts have to switch to a new method. There are several work arounds and the one that we've tried isn't currently successful because my site host won't let us change the CNAME to something with a trailing dot. Ok, so really I have no idea what I'm talking about because after reading all of the work around instructions on the blogger, "What to do if you are an FTP user" my eyes glazed over and I became preoccupied about wiping the drool from my chin. Please bear with me as I try to figure out this mess. I may end up just changing hosts and moving over to Wordpress which I've been meaning to do for the past 4 years but haven't gotten around to.
Maybe this will push in me in the right (write) direction and I'll just overhaul the damn thing completely. Like a phoenix from the flames.

Testing, Testing, 1,2,3...

Testing the new Custom Domain.

Dear Connor - 5 Years, 6 Months

Dear Connor,
I'm running so far behind in my posts that I actually feel guilty for not writing your letter. But I've been busy. Making gluten free pizza crusts and little scraps of cake so you don't feel left out in school. Washing the clothes and just being Mommy. It takes a little bit of time. The good news is that we are trying out wheat again. It's been 3 and a half months and while we've seen some positive improvements there hasn't been anything so dramatic that we couldn't chalk it up to maturity. Today we went to see Nana and you had a Nutty Bar and from there we treked to Grammie's where you enjoyed a bowl of goldfish crackers. Hamburgers for dinner on a real whole wheat bun. And you had no reaction at all. Can't blame a Mommy for trying I guess. We'll just keep on keeping on with the wheat and see what happens. You'll be thrilled to have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch tomorrow.

We got you into a charter school for Kindergarten and we are thrilled. The local school that our neighborhood feeds into wasn't bad, but this school is even better. You'll have to wear a uniform, (which I like) and the school day is an extra hour so you can learn foreign languages and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't concerned about how hard it's going to be for you. Usually you start to unravel around 3pm which is about the time that you'll be finishing up your last class. I'm doing everything I can to help you adjust, including putting you in school five days a week right now. I know you have the whole Summer to unadjust, but at least it gives you a little bit of a edge.

Over the past two months, you've ridden a pony, learned to do a solid front roll, made some recipes of your very own in the kitchen and learned to read. You actually already had a ton of site words and when I showed you how to sound out the word cat, you were off like a rocket. From there you were sounding out everything. I couldn't believe how fast you picked it all up. I know when you learn to read without any help at all, it's going to be the best thing ever for you. Today you went running outside to play with a book in your hand, because you wanted to show the neighborhood kids the story of The Dark, Dark Room. um. I don't think they were as into it as you were. You climbed a rock wall at the zoo, discovering your apprehension for heights and actually hit a baseball. I'll save your obsession with snakes for the next entry.
I love you,
Mama

Magic

It’s mid afternoon and Tristan is in the bathroom. I am questioning Connor about what type of object he just put into his stuffed dogs mouth, and he’s explaining it was medicine. Then I am questioning where the medicine came from and how he got it. (Turns out it was half a piece of chalk)

I hear the water running in the bathroom and see Tristan come racing out of the bathroom and back in again, half naked and holding the step stool. The water is still running. He throws the stool on the floor and hops on it, as I come in and say, ”I’m not sure what Tristan is doing in here, but it’s no.” Tristan ignores me completely and whispers, “look at dat water”.
I look at the running facet and there is an air bubble in the spout. Instead of coming out in a single trickle, it’s coming out in two symmetrical trickles instead of one. I have to admit, it does look pretty cool. I look at it for a minute and then turn it off and then try to turn it back on again to see if I can repeat the trick for Tristan who is still intently watching. I said to Tristan,” How did you make it do that, baby?” And he whispers, “magic.” And walks out of the bathroom.

Fishing for compliments

Me: Good Job, BUDDY!

C: Ok I’m going to go and put this trash in the trash can and then we can talk some more about what a good job I did.

Sweet & Sour

Me: Why didn’t you hang your clipboard up?

C: Because the nail fell out of the wall

Me: Why didn’t you tell me that? I would have fixed it.

C: Because I thought you would yell at me or sumthin’.

Me: Honey, I would never yell at you over something that you did by accident. When you do something by accident always tell me.

C: Oh. It wasn’t an accident.

Dear Tristan - 3 Years, 6 Months

Dear Tristan,
Where did my baby go? Just a few weeks ago you were snugly and cuddly and now all of a sudden you have turned into an independent three year old. For the past week you've been in more time outs than all of last month combined. At first I thought that you just weren't napping and that was the problem. But now this reluctance to listen happens whether or not you've had your siesta. I think maybe you are just testing the waters as you gain independence.
You've started whining my name. Instead of calling me Mama, you say, Ahma. And you say it about 100 times a day.


You've discovered how to change clothes and I would be remiss if I didn't mention the fact that this is a skill that you like to practice multiple times daily. You'll sneak upstairs and come back down wearing black dress pants and a Winnie the Pooh t-shirt. With this comes your obsession with shoes but at least you don't give me grief when you are getting dressed in the morning.



You are testing the waters with the attitude as well. You are more likely to get angry or retaliate against your brother when he wrongs you and you've taken to snatching things from him, something you wouldn't have dared a few months ago. I think we've been soft on you since you were the littlest but now that you are starting some of the conflict, you've found that suddenly Mommy isn't as tolerant as she used to be. You don't like this, not one bit.



You are giving up the nap. Now you can skip nap without cranking up a whine-fest at 5pm. If I put you down though, you will still sleep, which is super for me because while you are ready to give up the nap, I'm not ready to give up the nap. Because you are still enough of a handful that I like having the occasional couple of hours to get some stuff done, like wash all of the clothes that you've been putting on all day.
I love you,
Ahma

Couch to 5K

Something happened to me when I started the Biggest Loser for the Moms Club. Something odd and unexpected. All of a sudden. I could not stop eating. I think it’s in part due to the “I’m about to start a diet” mentality. You know, you know you are about to start a diet so you eat like it’s going to be the last bowl of ice cream you ever have. I started going back to the gym hoping that was going to get me back into the swing of things and it’s definitely helped although probably if I stopped eating after 6 I would see more results.

I saw on FB that my friend Amanda is doing a Couch to 5k program. I looked up the program and recognized it from last Summer when I tried it. Last Summer when I tried it though I was stopped by two things. Heat and pavement. Running on pavement sucks. And the heat, well it’s not very motivating.

But now with a gym membership, I had hope. And air conditioned room full of treadmills and sweaty people… and treadmills are much easier to run on.

The very first day of week one of the program, it felt like my shins were on fire. By the end of the week it wasn’t so bad though. The second week was tough but wasn’t as hard as the big jump in week 3. From 90 to 3 minutes. And I made it through. Today I did the first day of the third week and it almost killed me. But I made it. Which means that when I do it again on Wednesday it’s going to be even easier. The site says that most people give up around week three. That’s good for me to know. So I’ll be sure and load the iPod with some motivation to make it through. If you know any good songs that have a good running beat, (really really fast), let me know.

Hopelessly Devoted

I am hopelessly addicted to this:

Blue Cheese Avocado Dip
Ingredients:
4 ripe avocados peeled, seeded and coarsely mashed
1 clove garlic, finely minced
4 scallions, finely chopped (green part only)
2 tbs. olive oil
2 tbs. fresh lemon juice
1 cup Plain Oikos Greek Yogurt or Stonyfield Farm Fat Free Plain Yogurt
1/2 cup crumbled blue cheese

Directions:
Combine all ingredients in a mixing bowl. Refrigerate until ready to serve.

It is SO good. We never have crackers laying around anymore, so we use tortilla chips or veggies to dip in it. Even Tristan, famous for his dinner time, "I'M NOT GONNA EAAAATTT DDAATTT" whine eats it. Delish.

I Heart Valentine's Day

I've been using the new Gluten Free Betty Crocker cake mixes to make cupcakes for Connor (and his class). The mixes are expensive, but man they rock. Some people say that they can taste the rice flour in those. I say if you can taste the rice flour you don't have enough icing on it. I've had them without icing though and can't taste anything but chocolate cupcake.



Because I thought he might feel bad if he had to eat different cake than the other kids, I volunteered to make the cake for the class 100 day celebration as well. The 1 is GF but the zeros are just regular cake mix. I didn't do that because of the taste, but because of the expense. With only the 1 being GF it's a $10.00 cake. If the zeros were GF too it would be a $20.00 cake. It was delicious y'all.





The 100 should have stood for everything I did that week. When did Valentine's day become so hectic? We had the 100 day celebration, a field trip, a school project due, valentine's for both of the boys classes, teacher presents, conversation hearts for husbands work friends, conversation hearts for some of the moms at the preschool, a present for our baby sitter, presents for the boys and for husband. Granted I didn't have to volunteer to make a cake and cupcakes that week, but it wasn't the baking that was difficult. It was everything else with it. I'm all for bringing back the Valentine's day that was just a bunch of paper cards. I miss simplicity.

Knock on Wood

I've had a lot of questions over the past few weeks about the GF diet and how it's going. And the answer? Fantastic. Connor is super conscious about not eating foods with gluten in them. The truth is, I was worried about him feeling like the weird kid, but in fact it's the opposite. It makes him feel like the special kid. He's proud of his diet and doesn't seem to feel deprived at all.
One of the Moms at the preschool asked him last week if he he wanted some chips to which he responded, "Only if they don't have gluten in them." I can't believe that this is the thing that he's chosen to listen to us about. He doesn't listen to much he has to say, but he hasn't rebelled at all with the new diet. I am beyond surprised. I wonder if maybe he feels better without it.
We are starting to see changes. It might actually be WORKING! It seems to be happening slowly, but it's happening. He hasn't gotten a yellow card in school in 3 and a half weeks and that's never happened before. I couldn't be more proud. The circles under his eyes seem to be lighter also.
Making lunches and dinners are starting to be less of a challenge for me and we are probably eating better that we ever have, consistantly. We always have eaten fairly well, but without the gluten we can't just order pizza one night. Which sort of sucks. But is better for everyone.
He hasn't been sick as much either. And his moluscum is finally going away. I can attribute that to the vinegar baths and tea tree oil that we've been trying. It's so much easier than the Dr's approach to it, which was to burn it off. That might have worked for me if he'd only had 3 spots of it, but since he had 20 there was no way I was going to torment him like that. Especally since I kept feeling like with the eczema and the moluscum that something was going on with his immune system. Didn't it make sense that these were symptoms of a bigger problem? Why did I stop using holistic medicine in the first place? That probably deserves it's own entry though. For now I'm just glad that finally we are able to utilize the tools that will best help Connor be the best Connor he can be.

GF Baking 101

Gluten Free baking is interesting, my friends. It's completely different than baking with wheat and in some ways it's easier. Aside from the 5363 ingredients that it takes to make something that looks like bread and tastes like rice smells, there's no kneeding, you just mix, rise and bake. Here are some observations I've made so far.


- The GF dough isn't like dough. It's like cake batter. Bread has to be poured or spread, (in the case of pizza crust) into the pan.

- Do not taste it. GF Cookie dough doesn't taste anything like the cookie dough that you make yourself or buy in tubes at the grocery. It's fairly close, but just not quite right.

- Let your bread cool completely before slicing it.

- GF baking can be expensive. However, homemade GF muffins are cheaper than traditional wheat bakery muffins.

- When it doesn't turn out according to plan it will be upsetting. Possibly if it does turn out it will be upsetting if you aren't used to the flavor of the new flours and are expecting wheat flavor.

- It doesn't taste like wheat. You can't make it taste like wheat. But you can give it the texture of wheat, and then mask the flavor with other things. (Like peperoni, mushrooms and extra cheese).

- Set your expectations low. And hope to be pleasantly surprised.



These cookies don't look exactly like a traditional chocolate chip cookie, but they are close enough. I thought they were pretty good considering they were made from things that had names like, millet and sorghum. I made enough batter to freeze so that we could have decent cookies whenever we wanted.

Check it peeps. It's not stuffed crust, but it was pretty damn good for a gluten free pizza crust I had to mix, rise and bake 12 hours in advance. Because you know, I'm not doing anything else around here.

Tears of joy.