Dear Connor - 5 Years, 1 Month

Dear Connor,

I must say that you are a trooper with the supplementation ritual that we have you on. I got you and brother to take fish oil without complaint by following it with a spoonful of Hershey's Syrup. I'm sure the high frutose corn syrup isn't the best thing for your system, but it allows me to lure you into thinking that you want to take the fish oil.

You have been taking gymnastics classes, something that you are really into. They spend as much time chasing you back from the other side of the gym as they do teaching you how to tumble. I'll be glad when we get your focus a little stronger so that you can focus long enough to really learn something in your class, but one thing is for sure, all of that heavy work we do with you really pays off. You are strong as an ox. You are good at bouncing too. It makes me want a trampoline in the backyard, but I know if we had one here, you'd be over it pretty quickly.

You've lost your first tooth. It got really loose, really quick. That's because you were obsessed with it. We offered to tie a string to the tooth, tie the other end to the cat and then let your brother loose, but you didn't want to take us up on it.

Actually, you pulled it out yourself. You walked over to me and said, "Look Mommy it's really lose, and flipped it over backwards with your tongue". I knew that we should go ahead and pull it, but knew you'd be freaked out and I didn't like the idea of holding you down to pull your tooth. As I was debating on how your Dad and I were going sell you the idea that it would be fun and painless to remove part of your body, you got a look of intense concentration as you twisted the loose tooth. And then it was in between your fingers which is something you barely even noticed since you were suddenly enthralled by the hole it made in the row of your bottom teeth.

Congratulations! You are really a big kid now.
I love you,

Mama

Dear Tristan - 3 Years, 2 Months

Dear Tristan,
We kept talking about moving the chair that you love to sleep in. And we kept putting it off. This is mostly because we love sleep. You see, each morning you would get up from your bed at 6am, mutter to yourself for a few minutes and then get into your chair and sleep until precisely 7:15am. It's that extra hour and fifteen minutes that I didn't want to lose. I figured we've move the chair and you'd wake at 3am and start crying because it wasn't in your room then fall back asleep then wake again at 6am and not be able to go back to sleep. I pictured this happening until you were at least 16 or so.


But finally, one night before bed, I broke down the chair and moved it to the hallway. You came out of the bathroom from brushing your teeth and a look of horror crossed your face when you saw your chair in the hall. I explained that we were moving the chair downstairs and that it was still your chair, but you'd have to sit in it downstairs instead. Then Daddy came and whisked it away to the living room. You went and sat in the corner where your chair had been and started trying to stir up a tantrum, but then were quickly distracted by the lure of having a book read to you.

You went to sleep in your bed and you woke up at 7:15am. You did not seem to care a single bit that your chair was gone. All that ado for nothing. A few times later that week, I came into your room to find you sleeping on the floor in front of the door. That didn't last long though. You're smart so it didn't take long for you to determine that sleeping on the floor well... it sucks. Especially when you have a nice comfy big boy bed to sleep in. Lesson to myself: it's never as big of a deal as I make it out to bed. Thanks for teaching me that buddy.
I love you,
Mommy

Cartoon Us

My Southpark Family.

SPD Charlotte November Meeting

We had our third SPD Support Meeting last night with a behavorial therapist and an occupational therapist. They fielded our questions on "what to do when" and gave us some great advice. It was a relief to hear that other parents had some of the same questions we did and there are some things, at least, that we are already doing right.
I love my group.

Wee Yeasties!

I'm reading a fantastic book right now, Special Needs Kids Eat Right. I was putting off reading it because I thought that surely it was going to be 300 pages on how my kids needs to eat more veggies. It's not. I'm not sure if you've kept up with the news, or if you even care, but there are a ton of parents out there that are recovering their children from Autism. This book details this process they are using. This soon will be the process that we are using to try to help Connor. I have hope in Fish Oil, but since he has all of the symptoms of Candida yeast overgrowth... what if it's that? It is possible that he has too much yeast in his body, from Colic as a baby which caused Leaky Gut Syndrome which was exacerbated by antibiotic usage, (heavy antibiotic usage from ear infections) causing a cycle of complete yeast overgrowth.

Connor eats plenty of veggies and even takes fish oil without complaint. Tristan on the other hand exists primarily on carbs, specifically crackers, chips and cereals. Tristan actually randomly breaks out in yeast infections. Behind the ears, on his mouth. His last one appeared right after Halloween. There's the sugar link. What I'm saying is this. It is entirely possible that both of my children are so yeasty that it's affecting their health. In Connor's case it could be affecting his focus, attention and memory.

Ok, so you are on board with this, now what do you do?
You find a peditrician to prescribe an anti fungal like Diflucan or something. If you listen closely here, you can hear peditricians hysterically laughing at this. Because you'll probably never find one that will prescribe this, unless you can land a DAN doctor somewhere in the area. What then? You starve the yeast while supplementing with probiotics. Starve the yeast... that sounds easy, right? Sure. If you don't mind going gluten free, malt and vinegar free and sugar free. For me that would be hard. For Connor, it would be so incredibily difficult. Or would it? Is is worth not eating a cupcake for three months to be able to focus again? To not be shuned by other children and to be able to make friends? If you ask him now, he'd say no. Ask him twenty years from now and he'd probably have a different answer.
Are we going to try it? I think so. Maybe first of the year. In the meantime I'm going to start weaning him off of the gluten. Study up on what I need to do, get the hang of administering probiotics and maybe get a small bank loan since it's crazy expensive to eat gluten free. Is this crazy? Sound off for me here people. All lurkers are welcome to comment.

Connor's Mommy and the Very Bad Day

We had a rough day yesterday, including a birthday party at one of those small kids’ Gyms, where Connor, who was the only kid that was unable to sit still in line and wait his turn, was reprimanded every 15 minutes. The worst incident was when they had the kids in a circle around two large tumbling tunnels. The tunnels were stacked one on top of the other with a cone on top. The children were supposed to throw their balls at the cone which was about 7 feet off of the ground. The coach gave the kids their balls and asked that they wait to throw them. Connor threw his immediately. She waited for me to get his ball back to him and he threw it again. Then, he ran over and crashed into the tower toppling it over.
I was absolutely humiliated. I pulled him out of the party took him into the lobby and had him sit for five minutes to calm down. I talked to him about it. I threatened. He promised. Then I brought him back into the party, where he continued to ride the edge of the, Mommy will take me home if I don’t behave threshold.
To add insult to injury, one of the other Mom’s came over and told me that her neighbor’s kid has ADHD and that they make him stand with his arms out for 5 minutes to punish him and that it really works. Then she continued to launch into a stream of unsolicited advice about how I should be disciplining Connor. She didn’t SAY that’s what I should be doing… but coming over and just randomly explaining to me the types of discipline that works with her children. I was so completely shocked by this that I couldn’t even respond. All I can think about is how I can’t even explain to her how much we DO for Connor to keep him disciplined. That we have a detailed chart system, he earns chips and uses them to buy things that he wants. We have a bedtime clock so that when we take minutes off of bedtime he can see what his bedtime clock says, by matching up the hands next to the mantel clock it sits next too. That I’m constantly experimenting with different supplements and methods to try to help him. That we chart each thing that goes into his mouth, eliminate food dyes and do crazy therapy with him several times a day. That I probably read more in a week on how to help my kid than she reads in three months. I want to explain all of this to her, but I can’t, because I’m afraid that if I open my mouth, something else might come out. Something that’s not appropriate at a child’s birthday party. So instead I just get up and walk away. That’s what Gandhi would do, right?
I cried the entire way home and then three other times on the phone with random people. It was an awful day. It’s hard enough for Connor who honestly can NOT control himself. It’s not a matter of him not knowing what to do. He has no impulse control. Should I have taken him home? I’m so unbelievable sick of blame. Why does it have to be the parents fault all the time? Why can’t people get that my kid can’t control himself BECAUSE SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH HIS BRAIN?! Maybe I’ve been going about this all wrong. Maybe instead of doing all of this crazy shit, I should just take away his teddy bear. That ought to do it.
Does no one understand compassion anymore?

We Feel Fine

Remember the book that Tristan is going to appear in? It's coming out in December. You can preorder on Amazon.com or you can pick it up at Barnes and Noble next month. Or you could go pick it up at Barnes and Noble and walk around showing everyone in the place your kids picture inside of it. Yeah, I know... I probably have better things to do with my time, right? Not really. Here's more info on the book.
There was a nifty little applet in this entry, but it seems to have vanished so here's a link to the Amazon page if you want to view the cover.

Experiment # 117: Fish Oil

I posted info on the Oxford Study that I found on ADHD, Dyspraxia and Dyslexia and Fish Oil, but since I’ve found a study from Australia and found references to Omega-3s for Dyspraxia in a book I’m reading called, Special Needs Kids Eat Right. It didn’t make sense to me that so many children would have that much of an Omega-3 deficiency. I mean what about people from cultures that just don’t eat fish. Or people that just don’t like fish. Like me. I would think that the numbers of these disorders would be higher and there would be some apparent link… it must be something else. But then I read that they think that these kids actually have a problem metabolizing the Fatty Acids found in fish oils. Thus the deficiency. OK that, made total sense to me. That I could get behind. It clicked. It only helps 50% of the kids they studied, (in all of the studies I found), but if your kid is in that 50 percentile… your golden right? Results sometimes appear as soon as 2 weeks, but it can take 3 months for the full effects to be seen. I’ll give it four months. Either it works, or we end up with the smartest kids on the planet from all of the Omegas. At least then if Connor is bouncing off the walls, I can turn to the other Moms at the birthday party and say, “He’s a genius, you know.” Oh wait, I say that already.

I’ve found a Pharmaceutical Grade Fish Oil, that’s for grownups. It’s high in EPA and DHA. We are supplementing with Evening Primrose Oil which is a powerful source of GLA and are adding in some ProBiotic action to keep the intestinal flora healthy. The good thing about the liquid supplement is that it’s easy to split the dose into a child portion. It boasts to be the best tasting fish oil on the market. Connor will eat anything, but today he told me that he didn’t like it because it didn’t taste good. Looks like it might be time to add some Chocolate Syrup to the cocktail.

So far we are on day 3. Only 117 more days to go. Don’t worry, I’ll keep you posted. And by the time it’s over you’ll know more about the effects of fish oil than you’ve ever cared to.

Stick Figure Families

No no no. I'm not putting this on my minivan. As I've already mentioned there is nothing you can do to a minivan to make it look cute, trendy or cool. It's a minivan. But you drop the back row in that bee-atch and there's lots of practical to it. I like having a truck with a roof on the top. Even if it's kind of uncool and nothing like a truck. Ok, there I go barrelling off subject...
These images are everywhere. They seem to be a replacement for the Calvin and Hobbs peeing stickers that were so popular a few years ago. Remember those? I think the stick figure familes are cute, (although I wouldn't put one on my car) and I'm not quite sure why so many people have the hate on for them. I mean really, if you are wanting to hate on something, I think there's probably some Genocide somewhere in the world that you could take action to prevent. People waste their energy on stupid stuff... (like blog entries?). I know, there I go getting off track again. Maybe I need to be takin' some fish oil.
I created these for my Word Doc header for family letters. I've been typing instead of writing letters to family that doesn't have access to email (Grandparents and such) and these give them a little bit more of a personal touch. I'm so used to typing now that if I sit down to write a long letter my hand starts cramping. Oh stop. Don't even act like that doesn't happen to you.
So here's my stick family. Do you like how my stick person is about 40 lbs lighter than me? She's my fantasy self. The one that never goes to the gym and eats 5 cupcakes for breakfast every morning. Maybe she irons too...

Apple Picking

Recently we went up to the Foothills to procure some apples for my holiday jam (making) session. They had dwarf trees which were perfect for the kids to pick from without any help.

Connor found the best way to pick them was to get a boost from Daddy's shoulders and reach the ones on the tree tops.

Note the running three year old in the background. This place is like a dogpark for kids.

For some reason neither of the kids would eat the apples fresh off of the trees. Jorma and I didn't have any problem with it, but the boys were more into climbing the trees (Connor) or picking the apples and seeing how far they could be thrown baseball style (Tristan).

Too bad the great apple trip turned into the great apple famine (allergy testing). Not to worry about Connor though. When we are done with his three weeks of testing, he'll get apple everything, sauce, jam and maybe even one of the pies I made and froze for later.

Dyslexia, Dyspraxia and ADHD - Can Nutrition Help?

I am constantly on the lookout for new information on ADHD, SPD, ADD and Dyspraxia. So far Connor has SPD and Dyspraxia (which is a form of SPD) but I know that in two years when Connor is in first grade the teachers are going to start in on us about medicating him. He's a difficult kid. But I'm not concerned nearly as much about how it inconveniences his teachers as I am about what an inconvenience it is for him. I am hell bent and determined, that by the time he gets to first grade, we have this thing licked or rather - managed. We've been working really hard to practice his letters each night and tomorrow we are starting gymnastics to help with the postural issues. Attention focusing is still difficult. We aren't eating apples for allergy testing and are using a Homeopathic A+ Attention remedy that seems to not be working at all. Tonight when I was researching, (I should totally have a PhD in Google Research) I found this study. This study focuses on deficiencies of highly unsaturated fatty acids (HUFA) in children with various conditions including, Dyspraxia, ADHD and Dyslexia. I've added it to my collection.
I think that the rise of disorders like ADHD, Dyslexia and Dyspraxia is more than about a population increase. Especially ADHD, which has risen so high that we must be looking at an environmental factor or a dominate gene. So, if you know someone that has or has children with any of these conditions it might be worth sending them this study. I'll be sure to post any results from any experimentation we undergo.