Dear Connor - 5 Years, 3 Months

Dear Connor,
Something magical happened this weekend. It snowed. You and your brother couldn’t get out the door fast enough. After about 20 minutes, you couldn’t get in the door fast enough because it was dang cold outside and still sleeting. Daddy took you around a few laps in the sled, you tried to make some snowballs out of the sleet ice combination and concluded that snowball making was very hard. We did explain that it wasn’t good snowball snow, but that didn’t stop you from trying. For some reason the snow seeped in and cut off communication with your brain because later in the afternoon we let you out front for a minute while we finished bundling up your brother and then Daddy walked outside to find you standing on the roof of his car which was completely coated with a thick layer of ice. I don’t know how we’ve managed not to be on a first name basis with everyone in the ER but so far we’ve (you’ve) been lucky.

Today all of the kids were sledding down the hill in front of our house and you took a couple of turns and then decided that you wanted to go and sit by yourself in the snow by our house. Daddy came over to make snowballs with you and you were appeased for a little while but still didn’t have much interest in sledding. You did however have interest in the snow cream that we made yesterday, announcing that since it was made from snow instead of ice that it was ice cream. You cracked yourself up.
I don’t have any endearing you and brother stories to tell this month. There’s been mostly fighting. Always the fighting. I think it’s probably a phase or at least I hope it is. Your “little bother” can’t help but poke you when he walks by. And you will not resist the urge to poke him back.

Every day at school you have a different friend that’s your new best friend. I’m happy that you are making friends and I am angry for you if you tell me a story about how you were snubbed by another child. One day, you told me that you told the little girl in your class that her shoes were very pretty. You said that you told her that so she would like you and want to play with you but she still wouldn’t play with you. She was trying to teach you something very important. That no matter how hard you try you’ll never figure out girls. Just ask Daddy.
I love you,
Mama

Dear Tristan - 3 Years, 4 Months

Dear Tristan,
Every night when I put you to bed, you demand three things. A story. A lullaby. Snuggle time. Since you have your big boy bed, either Mommy or Daddy can climb into bed with you, while you pretend to be falling asleep. When I get up to leave it starts an epic tantrum that lasts for approximately 10 seconds and then stops so you can ask, "Tomorrow, can we go ice skating?"

I thought that you might actually know what ice skating is, since you've seen a little segment on one of your TV shows about a kid that goes ice skating with his mom. Since there's a new ice rink about 15 minutes away, we decided that on Saturday, we would take you ice skating. You were pretty excited about it all the way there. You didn't mind waiting in line. You were excited to see the ice skates that you were going to wear. Then we put them on you and you refused to walk on them. After a few minutes you had your feet under you and were walking just fine as long as we were holding your hand. We watched the Zamboni clean the ice and then went to get onto the rink. I picked you up and put you on the ice, ushering you over to the wall. And after a month of begging to go ice skating you decided one thing. No way in hell were you getting onto that ice. You were doing pretty well too. You had your feet straight and your balance was superb. I really think that you probably could have skated without my help at all. But that didn't matter because you started screaming and clinging to me or Daddy so desperately that we knew there was no way that you were going to get out there. We tried a few more times but each time you acted like we were bringing you to certain death. So you settled for sitting on the sidelines with Daddy, eating Reeses cups and watching the skaters.

We've declared that next time we go out to do something as a family, it will be something that you can get into also. I know you love a Reeses cup, but I felt like you were cheated just a little bit. I will confess though, when we took off our skates you were running around not listening and I told you to sit still next to us or I was going to put your ice skates back on. You sat.

You still pitch a fit some days when I take you into school. But it's not nearly as big of a fit as you pitch when someone says the word nap to you. I have to say I definitely appreciate the irony of you having a flat out tantrum about how you don't want to nap, mostly because you are so exhausted that you find it necessary to sob over anything that doesn't go your way. Like the nap.

Your brother has figured this out and announces loudly on the way home from school that you're going to have to go home and take a nap because tormenting you is his favorite thing ever. I guess there isn't much to do in the car so you guys like to see who can make the other cry the loudest while Mommy is driving. Before you start feeling sorry for yourself though, you should know that you do your fair share of tormenting Connor. Mostly you completely ignore him causing him to have a screaming tantrum because he's trying to talk to you and you aren't listening to him. You just stare out the window with a smirk on your face. I've never had to pull the car over, but it's coming. I know it as surely as I know that you'll never ask me if you can go ice skating in the morning again.
I love you,
Mama

Bread of my Ancestors

Wheat is a relatively new addition to the human digestive system. While humans have been on the planet for 100,000 years, for 90,000 years we ate what we could gather or hunt. This adds up to a 45 year old human eating wheat for the first time at 41 years of age. While 10,000 years IS definitely long enough for the human body to evolve it’s digestion processes, we also have to consider that wheat was primarily grown in Southeast Asia and didn’t make its way to Europe, (where my family hails from) until much, much later. The bread that our ancestors ate was very, very different than the bread that we eat today. I am explaining this because when I made my first loaf of gluten free bread last night that’s what I was thinking. This is the bread of my ancestors. Well, except they didn’t have Xanathan Gum.
 The bread I made was from a mix containing different starches (think potato) and rice flours. The yeast in the package was several months expired which didn’t help the matter.
I mixed the bread, being very careful to follow the instructions. The bread didn’t rise at all until I put it into the oven to bake at which point it gustily soared 8 inches above the rim of my bread pan. Didn’t matter. I was still hopeful. When it was done we had to cut it out of the pan, which made me feel tearful since I was anticipating a beautiful bread loaf that could be sliced and used for sandwich bread for the kids. But still, I was hopeful. The bread of my ancestors was waiting. I pulled off a chunk from the warm loaf and popped it into my mouth. The bread of my ancestors… well, it’s pretty nasty.
I was so disappointed that it made me sad. I was anticipating something that didn’t taste like THAT. It was awful! I put some oil and spices on the table to dip it in which definitely helped get the bread down, but after dinner I could not get the taste out of my mouth. I was mad at the bread of my ancestors. I was mad that it didn’t have that luscious taste of wheat even if it did have the texture. I was mad that it smelled sort of fishy.
The good news is that regardless of how I felt about it, the kids tagged it, not minding at all the fishy taste that was masked by the olive oil and spice. I don’t think they even knew it was different at all.
I have to master this bread thing though. Connor told me today that all he wanted for dinner was a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. And that made me sadder than even the bread of my ancestors.

Bon Appetit!

Living Gluten free isn't difficult. It just requires planning. Since we happen to have two children under the age of five there isn't much in our life that doesn't require planning anyway. The person that it's most difficult for is me. Not with the eating, but with the preparing. Since I'm in the kitchen three times a day, (four if you count snack), I'm faced with the cooking challenge.
Making the kids lunches for school isn't a problem. I have to make an extra snack for Connor to take so the preschool doesn't get stuck worrying about having GF food for the entire class. I try to make something special for him to take. He likes it when he gets different snack and all of the other kids want what he's having. That's just fine with me.
I'm about to start experimenting with GF flours which can be pre-mixed in a baking mix that can be used as a bisquick type base for muffins, cakes or pizza crusts. The flours in any base likely contain some or any of the following; sweet rice flour, brown rice flour, millet flour, sorgum flour, tapioca flour, xanthan gum, guar gum and cornstarch. Because these are speciality flours they are expensive too. I've heard a lot from other people about how expensive it is to eat gluten free. I think it's only expensive if you get obsessive about replacing the foods, that you are missing. If you are used to eating prepackaged foods and trying to replace those, it's expensive. If you don't mind spending a little bit of time in the kitchen, it's not that expensive or that difficult it's just time consuming. I'm sure that the bread doesn't have that delicious wheat flavor but the kids will be so happy to have a pimento cheese sandwich that they probably aren't going to care. Bon appetit!

Windows 7 Update

If you’ve ever used a Mac you’d love Windows 7. Actually, I should say if you’ve ever loved a Mac instead of used. I’ve used a Mac and PC both, but finally determined that there are better ways to stand out from the crowd than overpaying for your computers. (Let the hate mail, BEGIN!) I still have problems finding things and got extremely pissed over the new security settings that won’t allow you to go into any of the hidden folders unless you change the security settings to allow yourself to do it. It seems stupid that the main account that has full admin rights has to give itself permission to view these files. I finally moved my email over to my laptop, putting a stop to the putting down the laptop and going into the office to check my email and then forwarding email to my gmail account on my laptop cycle that I started. Yeah, I know, speaking of stupid right?

Now that I’m getting used to Windows 7 I’m starting to like it a little bit more. It’s definitely shiny. And what girl doesn’t like shiny?

Resolutions 2010

Although I resolved several years ago to never make resolutions again, to prove myself consistent I broke that one and started making resolutions again. This year I’ve resolved to:

· Get healthier, lose some more of the baby weight, (22 lbs down and 40 to go). I’ve got to start going to the gym again. I’ve been on hiatus since I’ve been having some digestive issues. They’ve thoroughly checked my gallbladder and other organs but still there’s no answer as to why I’m suffering from constant upper right quadrant pain. It takes so long with all of the testing and such that at least I know it’s not serious. If it was serious, I’d be dead already.

· Attempt to make it to church at least once a month. This includes finding a church that’s not all judgey and weird.

· Have someone over for dinner once a month (I stole this from my friend Julie and it’s a good one). When I say dinner, I don’t mean getting all fancy, I mean just having someone over… even if we are eating tacos. No good china, just some good friends and a bottle of wine. Remember that we are gluten free, ‘round here so expect a dish containing potatoes.

· Finally find some way to take that Anatomy class that I need to start on my going back to school journey.

· Jorma resolved to do a family outing once a month and I’m totally piggy backing his. We don’t do enough fun stuff as a family. Usually by the time the weekend comes we are exhausted and content just to hang out together on the sofa like a pile of puppies watching TV and giggling.

· Get my blog moved over to something better like Wordpress or Movable Type. I’ve been putting that off forever because it requires actually purchasing webspace instead of riding out the free web hosting like I have been doing, but it really limits me. I’d like a little more control, a better site and maybe even a storefront selling something… maybe sensory toys? There are a ton of people making little bits of cash from their own websites online and while I’m not expecting anything lucrative, it’d be nice to generate some sort of something.

I like posting my resolutions on my blog because it helps to hold me to them. Because then I can go in and take a look at the end of the year and see how I’ve done. I need accountability. So let’s take a look at last year’s (cringe).

· Put on makeup everyday - Does chapstick count as makeup? If Chapstick counts as makeup I did this one!

· Try out some cardio. I love yoga, but I'm not losing any weight... just firming up. I did this! Religiously for a while. For a long while actually. I lost 22 lbs but then came to a screeching halt in September when the first cold come to our house.

· Embrace joy. I’m not sure I did this like I should have. I think I just got so busy that I stopped enjoying all of the things that I should have been and started just trying to make it through. I will try to do better at this, this year.

· Spend more time doing things that are creative. More art. I did this! I joined the Matthews Artist Guild and set up our spare room as an art studio. This involved getting rid of a bunch of Jorma’s weight equipment, but that wasn’t a big deal since we have a gym membership.

· Set up a budget for the family and use it... for a whole year. I did set up a budget. And we didn’t use it at all. This is because it was my intention to set up a cash budget for spending. But we don’t use cash. It would work better if we set up two additional accounts with debit cards and moved our spending money for the month to those. And then used the main account for bills only.

So all in all, I didn’t do that bad. Maybe I can make this year’s happen. I think I can, I think I can.

Official Food, Inc. Movie Site - Hungry For Change? - Sign the Petition

Official Food, Inc. Movie Site - Hungry For Change? - Sign the Petition

We watched Food, Inc last night and rather than go on and on about it, I'll just say, if you have the chance watch it. It's interesting in some parts, horrifiying in others. It's not a bad idea to sign the petition for healthier school choices though. If you are interested in signing, this is where you do it.

It's a Hard Knock Life

Pippin puts up with a lot of torment, but he gets a lot of sweetness too. And might I mention his 5 year old slave loves nothing more than to feed him canned cat food and his three year old slave pets him so often that he's forced to hide in the garage for brief periods of time. I was hoping that Santa would bring him a girlfriend, but he'll have to hold out for Valentine's Day.



Everyone likes to snuggle with blankie.

Oh, don't feel sorry for him. He lives here rent free.

Footloose and Gluten Free

As of today we've decided to go gluten free. For those of you that have no idea what gluten is, let me be the first to explain. It's anything made with wheat. We are mainly partaking in this adventure because there is some research that children with food sensitivities (not allergies) sometimes respond to these sensitivities with neurological symptoms.
Sometimes these children have dark circles under their eyes, don't sleep well, don't behave well and have pretty short attention spans. Removing the wheat from the diet allows their bodies to rest and start to concentrate on other things that might be causing the problems. Then you pinpoint those new problems and start to fix them. Like peeling the layers of an onion.
Not only have we throughly researched this, but know people that have actually had profound changes in their children that were struggling with one issue or another.
This doesn't mean that we'll be off of wheat forever. It just means that we're off of wheat for a while.
Even at birthday parties. Even at your house. Even at the grocery store where they give out the free sugar cookies.
If we see positive change we can start to unravel the other issues that come up, strengthening his neuro systems and then slowly introducing wheat to his system again without his body thinking it's a toxin. If we go several months with this and we don't see any changes at all of course, we'll stop and try something else, but we figured, if not now when?
Footloose and gluten free baby! Come on over for dinner, y'all. We'll have ice cream for dessert.